Stinky Spikes New Vocabulary: Durianopathy

du.ria.nop.a.thy | \ (/ˈdjʊəriənπᾰ́θοy)

plural durianopthies

Definition of durianopathy

: any period or length of time where durians have been lacking in one’s diet causing a stressful craving disorder that can cause a person or group of people to seek any type of durian and dream or imagine eating them.

Usage

1: Over the last few months, I’ve been suffering from durianopathy.

2: Durianopathy made me pay more than double the price of what I would normally pay in Bentong.

3: This durianopathy has gone on long enough, you get out of bed and I will find you some durians!

 

Did you think I’d given up on this blog?Well, NO…! I’m just trying to find a way to find durians wherever I am. It’s not easy but its never far from my mind either. Last year and this has been a tumultuous time in Hong Kong, from the situations on the streets to the unrelenting death, disability and disruption by Covid19.

Hong Kong was challenging from the durian enjoyment perspective. Durians are expensive passengers and demand to be flown and not placed on ocean going ships. Then there’s the issue of pre-flight clearance procedures and packaging.

By the time the durian comes around, it is pricey, not very fresh and usually in other states apart from its natural one (ie. frozen rock solid, mashed into a mushy pulp or in some state of decomposition). I have the occasional treat when durian parties are organized but by and large those are fairly few and I have long durian droughts.

I am in Taipei and on the hunt for durians this summer. My basic research so far (shopping in markets) has indicated that the durian market here is largely dominated by Thai varieties, some masquerading as Mao Shan Wang in order to squeak out a slightly higher selling price. More on this in a later post….

There are Malaysian durians but they are considerably more expensive and only sold at very specific shops or the most premium supermakets.

I hope you will join me on this Taiwanese expedition.

Scientific publication on the nutritional value of du du du durian

It’s not very often that scientific articles about durian get published. The fruit is not the easiest subject to work with.

It’s glove-piercing thorns and distinct odor present some initial challenges. The fleshy interior goes through a change of state during ripening, from rubbery and unyielding to a slippery and flaccid yet flavorful fruit. Imagine opening 50 durians for research and resisting consuming them all… if I were behind the bench, I might be in the dangerous position of only doing research on the durians unworthy of consumption.

Several friends have asked me before if eating durian yields any benefit for health. Yes, I say. It contains a tremendous amount of fibre, protein and carbohydrates. Eating a whole durian is a meal. Just make sure you drink lots of water.

We can refer to the several publications on durian that have quantified these important nutritional constituents.

In this review article, the authors cite the proportions in the following order:

1) carbohydrates 27%

2) dietary fat 5.33%

3) fibres 3.1%

4) proteins 1.47%

Then there are the vitamins and minerals like vitamin C, folic acid, niacin, vitamin A, potassium, iron, calcium, magnesium, zinc etc.

I’m not sure how much of these minerals and vitamins is contained in durian (in terms of the RDA) but I wouldn’t recommend eating durian for every meal... mostly because very few people would want to hang out with you!

My recommendation is to have it seasonally and only pick the best, make each bite or lick count.

Love, Durians, Marriage

I’ve always thought it difficult when two people with very different views and tastes get married and live together for a long time. Does each person suppress their love and longing for their favourite food or item?

One of the most controversial foods between couples is probably durian. The spiky, smelly fruit can ignite passions and arguments, inspire love and hate, close doors in otherwise open homes.

I know of several halves (of a couple, not a durian) who forgo their love of durian to please their spouse or partner. Only relishing the fruit when the spouse is away. A different personality then emerges and congregates with other durian lovers, a brief but vibrant convivial session full of chatter, fragrance and licking of lips and fingers.

For me, I decided a long time ago that my long term partner must enjoy eating durian. They don’t need to enjoy discussing it, don’t need to know how to open it or identify it. Just being able to sit down and eat it with me is good enough. Why? Well, first because I like to have a few Durians and can’t finish them all on my own. Second, it’s always nice to have company at the table. Third, it’s helpful to have someone else around to snap a pic.

A while back, I came across this article about a durian seller looking for a spouse for his daughter. He had several criteria and I thought what he asked for wasn’t too unreasonable. Looks like his daughter has much selection work to do.

Thai durian seller looks for Chinese son-in-law on Facebook

Here’s an update on what happened after the news went viral.

The tallest durian tree in the world

I really enjoyed this article about the hunt for more elusive Durians. The red and orange Durians, as this article confirms are dead disappointing in taste and it’s just not worth the hassle apart from the novelty of bring instagrammed with it in your hand. Wild Durians probably are relatively “gamey” and appeal only to a narrow palate or if there’s nothing else around to eat.

What was interesting in the article was the mention of the tallest durian tree at 57.5m. The century old tree is located in the deep interior of Sabah in Kampung Kenang-Kenangan supposedly produces 2000 fruit per season. Wow… that’s a real durian bonanza.

The tallest durian tree is located in Tongod

He’s on the hunt for the tortoise durian .. I’m keen to know what that’s like.

Zero gravity durian

In the name of science, people are willing to do crazy experiments. Like crazy expensive experiments. Nothing is too much in the name of science.

The Thai space agency sent a vacuum packed package if Durians into space for a few minutes. Accompanying the Stinky orbiting astronaut were some packets of jasmine rice. (Here’s the article).

In fact, it’s so ridiculous a proposition that I wonder how they justified the cost. Well, here’s the rationale.

“In the future we want astronauts to be able to eat Thai food,” said a spokesperson for Thailand’s Geo-Informatics and Space Technology Development Agency (GISTDA).

Is this Thai astronauts eating Thai food or other astronauts eating thai food? Weird. The thai food that springs to my mind isn’t a packet of dehydrated durian. More like a great phad thai, a som tum salad or a fabulous Tom yum soup.

Any other reason?

“We want to see whether there are any physical changes after it returns to earth, for example it might get smaller, or cracked.”

Err ok... so you want to see if vacuum packaging works well in space or if freeze dried durian may dehydrate some more?

I just don’t get it. Let me know if you’ve heard the results.

A fruit that smells like itself

“I like fruit that smells like itself and not like something else” declared SC while cutting into some deliciously decadent milk tea roll from Yoku Moku.

“What does that mean exactly?” I asked my friend who was butchering the roll because the steel knife was a little too small.

“I just prefer fruit that smell and taste the same as how they visually appear… and are less pungent, you know” SC said grimly, examining his handiwork before offering up a grin as he served me a piece.

“Ok, so you don’t like durian. What other fruits fall into that category?” I was finding this very interesting indeed… the smell of fruits is indeed usually a subtle affair, made more so that these days, fruits are often sold packed in plastic, picked before they are ripe, or are genetically selected for other traits, scent not being one of them.

“Well… like mango for example. It doesn’t smell good to me.”

Really?! Delicious creamy mango, a fruit that has been marketed to represent the tropics and used almost as ubiquitously in equatorial cocktail drinks as the coconut?

“Err… what do you think mango smells like?” Probing… probing…

“Durian to me smells like cheesy feet, mango to me smells like raw sewage” he spat out. This description opened my eyes. Literally. I’ve never heard of mango described as smelling like raw sewage. Durian has been described by many using lots of nasty adjectives but mango to most South East Asians is sweet and fragrant(for example Thai and Philippino cuisine would be far drearier without it). How can our perceptions be so astoundingly different?

SC is a wine connoisseur, he has a sensitive nose and palate, able to distinguish the very flavours and “hint” components that make up the aroma of each wine. I’m assuming he’s very sensitive to sulphur and esters that are natural components in fruit, but perhaps are in greater concentrations in mango (and durian).

What does he like?

Grapes, strawberries, melon, peach, cherries, apples, pears, all citrus fruits. Not hot on banana, mango, jackfruit, durian. Got it.

The fascination will never end: A new durian cosmetic

Is Elianto’s durian-flavoured lipstick for real?

Here’s how the company described it:

Elianto said that the pesticide-free lipstick features a strong durian aroma that gives the wearer a “sense of satisfaction similar to gobbling a mouthful of Musang King at one go.”

And here’s the over-pitch:

“….this scientific marvel is even said to be able to cure hangover and prevent alcoholic blackout”

Hmm…..quite unlikely at lipstick dose.

The lipstick isn’t for sale yet, I can’t see how yellow lipstick would flatter anyone in or out of the office. So it’d be a great gag gift but not one that you might particularly enjoy receiving even if you like durian. That’s why we all wash our hands and rinse our mouths clean of the durian aromas afterwards.

Conceal as you may, the burps will always reveal the thorny truth. 🙂

Ps. Elianto, if you do launch it, please send me a Musang king lipstick to check out…..

Formula One Racing and durian… Disaster or Divine experience?

Durian lovers, formula one Red Bull fans, you might enjoy this video. 

This is how NOT to open a durian 🙂

The nangka tree off Sau Wa Fong

The other name for nangka is jackfruit. Perhaps you know it by that name? 

I was walking by Sau Wa Fong near Star street one recent weekend and spotted the jackfruit hanging off the very productive tree. Boy, did it look good. No, I’m not going to steal any. I don’t know who the tree belongs to and how it’s looked after. What I did do, was march down to the supermarket and buy myself a pack of Malaysian jackfruit. Yum yum, it was sweet, chewy and aromatic. 

What I did reflect on was that it would’ve been incredible to have a durian tree next to it. I don’t see why the durian tree can’t thrive here, especially with global warming… the winters have been getting shorter and milder. 

Anyone got a space for a durian tree on their doorstep? 

The Jackfruit hanging off the jackfruit tree

A durian dim sum recipe

A few weeks ago when I went to my local public library, I borrowed two beautiful culinary cook books. Ok ok they were in the category of “food pornography”. One on dim sum dumplings which I knew would excite the small one, whose tastebuds are “all about that base, all that base“ (ok base as in soup base…sorry couldn’t help it). Another on the uses of miso (mmmm… live for that salty and umami flavour).

So, apart from all those wonderful dim sum dumplings featuring fanciful folded scallop and shrimp and crystal skins, chef Janice Ong (Singaporean) also had the recipe for a durian dumpling called “durian nest”. As you know, the durian fruit has only recently (last 10 years or so) become popular with chefs looking to innovate, this durian dumpling is definitely not a classic dish. 

It’s essentially a deep fried durian pastry packed with calories and as flavourful as your best durian pulp. 

Durian dumpling recipe from Dim Sum

The caveat is this. The Amazon reviews of the book were really mediocre, many criticising the author for bait and switch where the recipes can’t be replicated. In the world of scientific publishing, the author would have had to retract the recipe and apologise to the entire scientific community and any future publications would be scrutinised like crazy. In fact, for misleading scientific publications, the author may never be allowed to publish with any authority ever again. But, this is the world of cuisine and I’m not sure what repercussions there are (if any). 

So, just to be clear, I haven’t tried the recipe so I don’t know if it’s good. But the picture associated with it look deeelissshhhh…..

Bonus if you make it yourself. No added sugar and no preservatives 🙂